10-56


I'm running around all carefree.
Arms in the air, waving to my friends
Then the virus everyone gets started to kick in.
I didn't take the medicine.

Everyone I knew, whatever they said, a lie.
When I look in a mirror I doubt and think why.
The virus now rooted in me still
kept these thoughts to me, I needed a pill.
It grew as I did, still growing, as I wished, following it
thinking, "They will get me out of this dark pit."
On the 4th of July, it grew worse
speaking and guiding me into a drought of hunger and thirst.
The worm that it was, tongue and tail,
kept spreading the lie, "We will prevail!."
I listened and I looked at myself and saw
a disgusting ugly breed of ogre and troll that caws
I restricted myself following their orders
And I did a Trump and made a border
In my mind. It was everywhere now
The virus that is what I once talked about.
I grew thinner and thinner told no one about my condition
I put on a mask and wrestle myself into submission.
This went on for a while and then one day it hit me
This is not what I want. "Quick! Somebody help and free me!"
Is what I would've said if I was not so shy
and also that great big virus kept a close eye.
I cried.

I reached out of the bars of my cage
I didn't know how to deal with- was this sadness, madness or rage?
I was losing myself, I declared this person mentally insane.
I was the doctor, patient and the friend in this triangle of pain.
It was getting closer. The big day.
This was my punishment, where I would have to pay.
Let me out of my room and pray, for "Father, I have sinned."
I dug myself into a hole where I got myself pinned.
I go to the only mirror I have, the one I cracked it cackles
and says that he's got the last laugh
The qualities I lacked, the bar I set so high,
that I now know that I could never reach, I lied
To myself.

I see now the white walls turned red and black,
I fell down a hole that the virus made, oh so long ago
I'm drowning in my own nice bubble bath.
It was dark down here all on my own
It was so cold with only the standard I set so long ago to go
So dragging my feet I put on my one of my various masks,
Who am I, Mike Myers? That crazy psychopath?
With a fake smile and laugh, not too different from Jeff.
I set out to meet all my friends and fans now becoming Sans that sweater wearing, evil cave dweller skeleton man I am. I was a fan.
Now I am a tired always cold and hungry locked in my room twenty-four seven. "I'm not good enough for all of them."
It turned grim. The thoughts invaded I couldn't wish them to begone. They just kept coming on and on and on and on and on.
The worst part was some part of me still thought they were right. I Wasn't scared maybe that was why I couldn't see the light.
Because I thought it was alright. It wasn't.

The voices kept arguing around in my head, taking sides
I felt like lead. I just wanted to get out of bed
and feel happy again. I hated myself more each day and night
I felt broken; black fog surrounded me making it harder to breathe
I was so stretched thin, I took Dory's advice but it was so hard for me to swim because the waves just kept coming in
each harder than the last. My ears were ringing the noise just wouldn't past. I wanted to scream but nothing would come out.
The fog kept growing thicker and thicker
"Haha!" Jokes and memes, but that doesn't stop it from growing bigger and bigger. The answer I turned away from becomes clearer and clearer as I grow sicker and sicker.
"Please excuse me from dinner. I have to go." I go to back home wondering which way is quicker. I knew needed help but didn't tell anyone yet. No.
That last thought was my last regret.

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