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Women always say, “Its’ so hard to find a good man! All the good men are either young, gay, or married.”

I guess they forgot about all the above, but
Do they realize how hard it is to find a good woman too?

Really.
Just,
How hard is it to find a friendly yet frisky woman who, knows what she wants, is working towards it, doesn’t play games with you…and doesn’t over 1,000 followers on Instagram?

I mean, I know this isn’t build-a-bitch workshop, but
For the first time in my life I want an average American sized woman who’s got a phat ass, but
Also a fat brain.
A brain that is so Spongebob that she can constantly soak up knowledge, but has enough pores so that her mind stays open and she can understand different perspectives.

And I know this isn’t build-a-bitch workshop, but I just know that certain combinations of characteristics in woman
Change
My
Life

I just want the phat ass, and the fat brain, because
I’m always thinking about how
A Black woman with a phat ass would be the life of me,
A White Woman with a phat ass would be the death of me, and
A Latina with a phat ass would be the time of my life

Oh…and a Asian with a phat ass? Yeah I already had that.
It was pretty good.

And I know I’m no Idris Elba with, washboard abs or a swagger than can just enchant all these wonderful women in my environment, but
Damn!
Can I find a woman that’ll help me get there?

Or is it still how it has been for the past LMNOP years
Where, if you’re a fat or ugly guy you have to learn to deal with rejection more, but
If you’re a “plus sized” or “Multidimensional” woman you’re just a
Big Girl. And
People should just accept you for who you are, because
Big Girls need loving too?

Hmm.
I just spend a lot more time now thinking about double standards, because
I know it’s my male privilege to not be affected by most of the illogical archetypes that have been
“Making America Great Again”
But I’m just trying to bridge the gap for actual equality among the sexes
So that I can just hold all the womanists to the same axiom that they want to be at, but

There’s levels to this shit.

And I know that because I’m a WGS major.
And I hate it so much, but at least I understand why I should change my vernacular.
So that instead of saying, “Grow some Balls”
I say, “Grow a Vagina” because those things bleed and are always taking a pounding but look how resilient they still are

I digress.
It is hard to find a good man, but
It’s so comical, because
How is it almost just as hard finding a good woman when there’s twice women as there are men?

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