2:00 AM

2 am
doors locked, lights off, alone
2 am
shaking hands, racing heart, burning thoughts
2 am
how did I get here?
why am I so weak?
what's wrong with me?
it's 2 am and
I thought I was better
I thought I was moving on
I thought I was okay
it's 2 am and I was wrong
it's 2 am and
I'm on the bathroom floor
screaming, crying, asking - why?
it's 2 am and I'm trapped under a tidal wave of my own self-hatred
it's 2 am and the urges scream
reach for the bottle
reach for the pills
reach for the blade
it's 2 am and
all I can think is die, die, die
but that would be too easy
it's 2 am and I realize the strength it takes to live
it's 2 am and I realize I'm not strong enough

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