A Walk In An Addict\’s Shoes
A Walk In An Addict's Shoes
When I went to jail, I was not confined to a cell; I was confined by my mind, to my own personal hell.
When you are an addict, the drugs are only a mere symptom of your disease; Do not get it twisted, please.
Addiction is not based upon using nor drinking; It is an error in the individual's thinking.
It affects the mind; To reality, the addict is blind.
Addicts are obsessive and compulsive; Their decisions are impulsive. To you, their behavior may seem repulsive.
Before you judge an addict based on their behaviors, light me give you insight to their personal endeavors.
Addicts are insecure; Feeling different and less than brings them internal pain to endure.
Addicts have an internal void; Everything inside of them feels destroyed.
Addicts search to fulfill that empty space; Thus self-centeredness is what they face.
This search leads to unsuccessful attempts; The addict becomes filled with resentments.
With the addict's feelings being their personal concern, they are unable to deal with life on life's term.
Due to their feelings being extreme highs and lows, their minds are consumed Voices within tell them that they are doomed.
Denial and self-pity are every addict's friend and enemy; Awareness of the two are part of their remedy.
Addicts run from their feelings out of fear; Their pain is bound within by every uncried tear.
With addicts, their built up resentments are lingering; Isolating becomes their preference over mingling.
By the addict's denial of their mental quandaries, the addict is condemned; They turn to other sources in order to fend.
Some addicts seek a significant other; Some addicts seek gambling, sex, or go even further.
When these manifestations fail, in order to escape their disease's conviction, addicts turn to alcohol or drugs and start a new manifestation of their addiction.
This becomes their solution to escaping reality; Little do they know about its brutality.
Addiction takes the addict over full force; The streets become their greatest source.
Now comes their own personal walk through hell; For that next fix, our own souls us addicts would sale.
You probably are confused as to how a substance controls the abuser, but in reality, the addict is the abused; By the drugs, the addict is the one being used. Now place yourself in their shoes.
The substance appears as an angel in disguise; It takes you by surprise.
You are left feeling euphoric after your first consumption; It is harmless is your assumption.
Before you know it, you wake up drenched in sweat; Cramps and insomnia are next, on this, I'd bet.
Do not fret; The disease already has a plan set.
The voices whisper, "Take one more, you can metaphorically soar, and your pain will go out the door."
One leads to two; Only to the dope game are you true.
In the cycle, you are trapped; Until something inside of you is snapped.
You seek help in desperation; From yourself you need salvation. You are the monster of your disease's creation.
Despite wanting to change, life without drugs now seems strange.
You will slip and fall, until, upon the fellowship of NA or AA, you call.
Chemo is to cancer as NA and AA are to addiction; You must work a program in order to be free from your disease's conviction, and your state of dereliction.
I hope this has helped you to see, things are not always what they appear to be.
To you, this may be news; You should not judge others, until you have placed yourself in their shoes.