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(Almost) 12 Steps


I've been having the urge to drink again
Pick up a bottle, say hello to an old friend.
To savor the smoothness and relish the burn
Giving in to temptation, what I used to yearn.
Unclear memories on the tip of my tongue
Knowing one single drop and I'm back to step one.

I've been having the urge to drink again
To lose myself but find my Zen.
To recall first love, the one that I lost
in the caramel-colored liquid, the ultimate cost.
Relying on instinct to help me muddle through
Knowing one single drop and I'm back to step two.

I've been having the urge to drink again
Release my inhibitions, flirt with women and men.
Sing without fear, in an off-key tune
Dance with a stranger, go back to their room.
Praying like hell, God will somehow forgive me
Knowing one single drop and I'm back to step three.

I've been having the urge to drink again
Live in the moment, throw caution to the wind.
Taste the vanilla, zesty fruit, hearty oak
Head against a toilet, Lord, please don't let me choke.
Clean myself up, stumble to the door
knowing one single drop and I'm back to step four.

I've been having the urge to drink again
Let the melting ice cubes take me to when
Mama still loved me, I was her little girl
Pretty in a sundress, making it twirl.
Smiling and laughing, I was so alive
knowing one single drop and I'm back to step five.

I've been having the urge to drink again
Liquid courage like a lioness, Queen of the den.
Happy-go-lucky with a smile on my face
Nothing bad can happen from one little taste.
I'm not a junkie, I don't need a fix
knowing one single drop and I'm back to step six.

I've been having the urge to drink again
Like Hemingway with ink from his pen
Writing my novel, winning a Pulitzer Prize
With shaky hands and bleary eyes.
On the cusp of greatness, so close to Heaven
But with one single drop, I didn't make it back to step seven.

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Key Words : Drinking

  1. Jaco Coetzer says:

    This is deep, and well constructed. A poem one can easily read, connect too, and follow. This is really good work.

  2. ayla says:

    this is amazing I love you so much and the poems too

  3. ayla says:

    this is amazing I love you so much and the poems too

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This Poems Story

While I was never an alcoholic, per se\', from an early age, I had a tendency to drink my feelings. When I met my wife 13 years ago, I made a conscious decision to not let it go any further. I learned other ways to cope.