Am I Too Suicidal?

To care or to not care that is the question I wonder
For the sky in my head is filled with stormy thunder
If I ask myself to find a reason to care it’s hard
It feels like my life was altered by the fate of a card
I try to be brave and strong for me and for all
Without hope there is no reason for me not to fall
For my trials have been tough and longer than most
What’s left of my soul is an empty body just a ghost
I’ve tried to give up more times than I can count
I climb the mountain only to jump for I can’t amount
Going on with the pain in my heart wanting it to end
No longer will I wear a mask no longer will I pretend
When I’ve decided to give up I will tell no one
Dying will let me be at peace lifting a weight a ton
I’ll say goodbye to those who are close
It would be a toxic amount it would be an overdose
People would cry that I’m sure they would miss me
I would really hope they could see that I would be free

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