Angel


Me: a 21 year old heartbroken mess looking to drowned my sorrows.
Chasing a buzz.that I already found hours earlier.
Alone in a bathroom with a door that didn't lock.
At a"party" that wasn't a party at all.
Brought by a friend who was chasing a different kind of buzz.
Not alone for long because soon he was there.
Angel:a stranger who didn't speak my language.
A stranger who seemed interested in my friend earlier at the bar,
now definitely interested in me.
Armed with the only defense I could physically achieve.
The word"NO".
No matter how many times I used this word he did not stop.
"No"is the same in Spanish and English and no means no right?
"No"did not protect me from this Angel who was no angel at all.
So embarrassed, so ashamed. It was my Fault. I was a drunk slut.
I shouldn't have been there. Shouldn't have drank so much.
Should have been able to get him off.
Did not tell a soul that he implanted his seed there
in that bathroom to grow inside of me, without what they call
"my consent".
Could not hide the real angel. Born nine months later.
My baby, my son. 8lbs 12oz. He is truly mine.
No name on the father section of his birth certificate.
No child support. No daddy of his own.
I am known as the girl who doesn't know who her baby's father is.
The slut or the whore who had a one night stand with a stranger.
Angel is a man with a son he will never meet, never know.
Who looks just like me, a person he probably doesn't even remember.

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