Arrivederci

A burning sensation,
and athazagoraphobia.
Lost feeling, fixation,
And dystychiphobia.

I met you in the fall.
Elysian visions, I had then.
Was a house, I recall.
Filled with memories and forgotten.

My mind has ossified.
And my brain atrophied.
Apricity, I shall remember.
And the clinical catastrophe.

Depleted vorfreude.
And a memantine, galantamine.
Family with no pride.
Of tears and astrayed dopamine.

Fallen leaves, next to him.
The bell, it will ring. I sat there. Choke.
No cardiac rhythm.
Gone, my husband, from stroke.

What husband? Hm? What guy?
Memory, but not memorable.
Song, unsingable, why?
Life is absent. Irreparable.

Oh, don’t know any of you.
Well, all I know is that I miss him.
Wore his blond coat, used to.
A wink, a smile, a kiss, a hymn.

No. Forced to a new home.
Who’s people, not me, not them, not here.
Who’s here? Not me. Who roams?
Nurses, needles, medications, fear.

Visitations Thursday.
Bingo and trembled fingers Friday.
Walk, if able, Tuesday.
A fetching dance to death on Sunday.

Peiskos, a warming light.
A fire emitting a white smoke.
Off the bed, I chase light.
His vibrance shines unlike kinsfolk.

Heaven, angels, gold gates.
Dementia fades and I can see right.
John, husband, found my fate.
Yet, I miss the chilled spite.