Being built up. Then torn down

I’m so guarded
I sometimes think no one really knows me at all.
The future feels like a foreign concept.
But with every birthday
I’m reminded what a lie that is.
I have no feelings
I’m over emotional
Love is best experienced
In books and movies.
Then you never have to be disappointed
Or get your heart broken.
I still look for her then I remember and stop.
Do you forgive me ?

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