Best Bad Habit


You were my best bad habit, couldn't see past it.
You took my love for granted, stabbed it, then trashed it.
How could I love you so much with so much disgust?
You brought out the best in me in the worst ways I've ever seen-
didn't need nicotine.
How could I celebrate a headache,
not regretting my biggest mistake?
I adored how you treated everyone else, except me,
thinking that one day you would see
I was the only other woman you need.
Birthday, Mother's Day, Fourth of July, Valentine's Day were important holidays to me,
but all you gave was a Happy Halloween.
I gave, you took; I said I loved you, you looked.
Decided you weren't ready for a relationship
to discover, you weren't even ready for friendship.
Moved back in May, and now it's May again and again.
All that time has passed, and were still not friends?
It's too many people who love you t to love the one who don't.
Sad thing is, when he realizes it, you won't.
So compassionate, not about you and me.
This man I'll never forget.
he was the best bad habit I've ever seen,
almost at the age of thirty-three.

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