Blue-Eyed Boy

You told me never to let my happiness depend on what is not certain
But I was falling so fast
I never realized he was keeping me from hitting the bottom
And boy I found that bottom so fast that I couldn't remember a time
Where love didn't feel like drowning
At first the concavity was merely a cold lake on a sunny August day
And one big dive in was all I needed
But August turned to November
And I was frozen at the bottom
Of what I thought would end in my favor
I blame myself because his hand grabbed mine
Before I took my last breath
To pull me from the bottom of the river
The last time I was down there
And I was stupid enough to believe that he was there to save me
When I have been through it all before
His devil eyes were disguised as a helpless long
That he needed me too
When I now know how far that was from being true
I want to hate him but I can't stop hating myself
For being blind to this game and I wonder if it will ever end
But for now I will wait for another grab at my wrist
That will pull me to the surface
And I will look for his blue eyes inside of this new boy
When he tells me that everything is going to be okay

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