Body of Proof

pleading you to pick up
the scalpel, slice straight to my heart and
carve the loveliest little lies and
poems into my veins and arteries and then sew me back up
so that every beat of me flows with the poetry
you eventually crumpled up and burned
crack ribs and excavate the lungs that you used
to breathe so much life
into and the oxygen that left as soon as
you did
trace the legs and knees that would have run any
distance to keep you with me but eventually gave
way when you didn't get yours with me
lying on this examination table,
every inch of me a witness
to the little memories you left on me
head swirling with thoughts of
what could have been, shoulders aching with the weight
of the regrets you made me carry
knees weak from praying for forgiveness
that was slow to come to me and
toes perched in the hopes of reaching up one last time
to look into those endless brown eyes
body of promises, body of pain
body of self acceptance after you
gave me no choice to love
myself the way you said you always
but I'll always be a
body of proof

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