Cacophony Of Memories

In my head sounds a symphony;
A story of sweet-bred bickering and slurred speech.
It starts softly: I came of age at the cusp of fourteen,
The hands of time forcing me to become an adult.
It was when I discovered diets and worshiped starvation,
a religion fueled by the forceful comments of my brother.

Staccatos arise as Grandmother's pot possession
and grandfather's slight addiction to alcohol emerge.
It grows louder as anxiety and animosity angrily appear,
ruining the tightly-threaded family we had forged years earlier.
It booms as bulimia blossoms and suicide strangles all of us -
Slowly killing my psyche and predicting my death.

Notes of regret and harmonies of harm accompany me:
clusters of chaos swirling in the space of my sadness.
It will never leave; it will never let me forget:
the cacophony I created when I left childhood behind.

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