Conflictions


To walk a line so fine it seems I can't dodge the bullets this time
Torn between two worlds, two lives, but towards neither,
I wholeheartedly strive
Under the haze of smoke the differences that divide dissipate,
but a troubled mind to further complicate
I question what my motives may be, to attain a temporary bliss,
or to escape the pain of reality?

To delve deeper into substances one's life shall be missed,
it's like the longing of a lost lover's kiss.
Fully knowing, I wonder how I manage to relapse,
the regrets of my past resurfacing fast.

If I were to fatally fall
would my righteous intentions be considered at all?
Would I be cast aside a delinquent, decidingly deservant of death,
or as an unfortunate victim, incapable of taking in another breath?
The apparent foe of fate at such a young age,
maybe I am to view this as just another ripple in a lengthy page.
I desire no half-hearted pity, my struggles, to me,
are representative of my love-hate relationship with my city.

From my unique perspective upon the hill,
I see countless individuals crumbling like our many mills.
Will I slip into a similar situation, my sins earning me
eternal damnation?
I ultimately realize I cannot let my potential for
greatness pass me by, and knowingly,
throw my dreams towards the heavens and the ever-reaching sky.

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