Dad’s Bowler Hat


The dog that chewed dads bowler hat
Really wasn't a dog, it was our cat.
I found the brim, soggy, chewed and bent
And puss asleep in the crown, content.
When dad came home that day from work
He blew his stack, he went berserk.
His moustache it quivered, his face went red
So next doors dog got the blame, instead.
Dad raced round in a righteous huff
and grabbed the poor dog by the scruff.
The dog reacted as well he might
With a frightened yelp and a painful bite.
Now things got hectic, the dog chasing dad
It woke up the neighbours, and boy were they mad
It was sheer pandemonium, the noise and the din
An uproar so great, the police were called in.
I'll never forget the look on dads face
When the police caught the dog and ended the chase
When asked what had caused such a frightful scrap
Dad replied lamely, "He chewed up me 'at".
Dad limped back home, his dignity in shreds
Cops back to the station, neighbours to bed.
That just left the dog, and of course, the cat
Who curled up together, asleep in the hat.

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