How do I explain what I don't understand?
My depression is in many ways my best friend.
But it's also my worst enemy.
Always teasing me.
Always making me try harder just to survive.
My depression is telling me I don't make any sense right now.
Let me try again.
Depression is like...its like...Um, ok depression is … not talking right so you don't talk at all.
It is hating yourself then hating that you hate yourself.
It is the voice in your head that tells you mean things about yourself-
Shut up! They don't care, look at you, you are worthless, just shut up!
Why are you still talking?-
It is the biggest serial killer of all time.
It gets in your head and tells you that you're alone so you start believing it, all the while pushing everyone away.
Even if you had tons of friends, they wouldn't stand a chance.
How can they fight what they refuse to see?
So you try to fight your depression but it has this voice.
It tells you to stop fighting and all fight leaves you and you accept it because you are alone with nobody to fight for you.
No, I will never be controlled by my depression again… at least until it makes another request.
It's like an abusive relationship that you can't get out of.
It is saying hi to strangers then hating yourself when they don't say hi back.
It is the feeling that everything's your fault.
There is no way out.
I am trapped inside my own depression.

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This Poems Story

Its is an explanation of depression