Deepshikha Rana

I miss you my laughter!
How carefree, Confident,
consummate, coruscating you were!
It wasn't that everything was perfect in my life!
Heck, you already know that!
But there was this incessant zeal
to rule the moment, the day and my fate!
That obnoxious stubbornness to laugh hard
as my circumstances became even harder!

Sure, I had my bouts of inexplicable pain,
Those sudden outburst of impregnable tears!
But you managed to vanquish it laughter!
You and me both know,
I was never the carefree type,
Neither the naive type,
to see the world
with rose coloured spectacles!
But even then,
I had this sanguinness that
no matter what life throws at me,
I will rise like a phoenix!
Slowly depression crept into my life!
Hahaha, no!
I can't lie to you,
Afterall you were my only shield!
Shielding me from all the criticism,
underbelly comments, Bitter people,
jealous people, family drama,
loneliness, diffidence, dreariness,
bleakness and a lot of fucking chaos.
It was sudden like a heart attack,
Only my mind and entire body bewailed!
I couldn't read, I couldn't stop blinking,
I couldn't eat, I couldn't stop crying,
I couldn't be confident, I couldn't have faith in my abilities, I couldn't sleep, I couldn't kill myself!
That was when,
you broke up with me my laughter!
But you already know that , don't you?
I miss you terribly my laughter!
I see the mirror and force a smile!
But you and me both know,
being fake was never my style!
I miss you terribly,
my darling laughter!

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