every bad thing in the world


every bad thing in the world

drugs.
good drugs.
almost as good as loving someone.
I seem to have overdosed on that fantasy.
I thought I had a lock on you, lover. You seem to have been set free and let your words slip up and consume me like a tumor in my heart. The worst is not understanding what I say; as if i speak a language with no translation.
Tell me where I lost you.
Let me drown in the memories of us. Let me remember your eyes in the blinding sun. Let me swim to the day we met. When I thought loving you was something I wouldn’t regret.
But I can’t lose you, lover.
I look back into your eyes and I see cataracts of pain take over your pupils.
Unknown disease, please leave my lover alone and take me instead because I love hating you.
I hate you because you give me every reason to love you just by being with me.
I tried to give you the world even when mine was falling apart.
I salvaged the fertile ground and left the debris to myself.
Me alone with my insecurities is like an alcoholic in a bar with nothing but him and the substance that will kill him but he just doesn’t think about it as the last few drops enter his bloodstream. Death knocks at the door but the door is wide open. Now take me and set me free from all the bad things in the world.

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