Finding Strength in Epilepsy

I used to wake up thinking this isn't my life
I was in denial
And the sweet thing about denial is
That it worked
I was able to convince myself
But no matter how much I lied to myself the pain wasn't going away
This pain was real
This fear was real
It was unbearable to wake up and "hope" that I would be fine
I wasn't
How could I be fine and no one understands how it feels
To be so unsure of yourself everyday
How terrifying it actually is
There isn't much that I can do about it
My mind is everywhere
So, on my quest to find comfort and stability
I go to search everywhere and anywhere
Until I am at peace with myself

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This Poems Story

I am a twenty-six-year-old San Francisco resident. I've been writing poetry since third grade and I just remember falling in love with it. I recently graduated from CCSF in the spring of 2015 and unfortunately I was diagnosed with epilepsy a week after graduation. I was unable to work, so I relied on writing to get me through eveything I was feeling. At first I was reluctant to write about my condition; then I realized that if I wrote about it there was a chance I could reach someone else going through the same thing. That's what inspired me to write "Finding Strength in Epilepsy."