I walked to the river all decked in my gear,
with hip boots and rain cap, and six cans of beer.
He didn't stand a chance when the next dawn would come,
that fish in the lake had great reason to run.
I was meaner than ever from my last escapade,
I brought guns and a knife, and a big net I'd made.
I awoke in the morning and sat down to eat,
Then when I was done, I gritted my teeth.
I looked all around to my right and my left,
Then strapped on my gun, my knife and my net.
I threw in my line, then I waited to draw,
I waited and waited but no fish I saw.
Then at last here he came, yea that big friend of mine,
I'll kill 'em I thought, as I bided my time.
Snip went my line, it was bitten in two,
He had eaten my bait and the line that I threw.
I'll kill 'em I screamed as I threw in my net,
By then I had chewed up a lit cigarette.
I drew out my gun and I shot at his head,
Dang it I said as my face turned all red.
I shot every shell at that big ugly brute
Then I let out a scream 'cause I'd shot through my boot.
I was screaming in pain when I took off and ran,
Then slipped on my butt on an empty beer can.
At home in my cast as I laid down to snooze,
I reported the hunters that shot up my boots.
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