What is this…? A dream or a nightmare? I sat in the darkness for too long. I tried to breathe but the water surrounded me. I gasped for air but I got nothing in return. So I sat and waiting. For a sign. For a sound. For anything.
I waiting for years to get what I wanted...what I needed.
Then I heard a voice. It was quite compact but it was there.
I swam forward as the voice got louder and heavier.
Then I felt it. The air on my raw pale flesh.
I coughed up blood for hours before I could properly breathe again.
I looked around but I could see nothing and no one.
My heart sank. My body trembled. My feet gave up. And I fell.
Back into the darkness that surrounded me.
I tried. And tried. And tried again to find that voice.
But it was nowhere to be seen or heard.
So I gave up. I gave up fighting. I gave up searching.
And I gave up on myself.
“I’m sorry”. I whispered to myself.
“I’m not strong enough to carry us. I have failed you and myself.
I am no longer responsible for this decaying body of mine”.
And so I let go. And I fell deeper and deeper into this hole of darkness.
As I hit rock bottom I could see the faintness of light.
I wanted to get up to see it.
But my body, and heart, and mind had given up.
I could no longer feel anything. Goodbye to my mother.
Goodbye to my father.
Goodbye to my friends. Goodbye to my family.
I am no longer able to live in a world like this. I’m dead.