haunting memories


it was so easy for you to forget me
but i'll never forget you no matter how hard i try
sometimes i can still smell you, and the way you wreaked of smoke and booze
sometimes i can still feel you and the way your strong hands gripped so tightly around my little wrists
sometimes i still hear your voice, your deep low grumble, as your words slurred together into one mushy pile of letters telling me to never tell
sometimes i still see your smile, that filthy toothless grin you gave me as you unzipped your slacks and pulled off your stained t shirt
sometimes i can still hear my desperate cries the ones that got distinguished within your constant groan of pleasure
sometimes i still remember when it all stopped when all the pain was gone and i stopped fighting and everything stopped
sometimes i still feel the tremendous amount of nothing i felt that night as i went to bed and the endless stream of tears that ran down my cheeks dried up and the incredible amount pain turned into emptiness and that in the moment, i was gone, i was alone and no one could save me
it's been almost 8 years and i still think about you everyday, i think of the way you stole me out of my own body, and left me with only a shell a fragile outline of who i was, you've consumed so much of me and obliterated every bit of strength i had
and you just disappeared leaving only traces of your haunting memories

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