heart in my hand

it feels so hard to breathe, yet so easy to cry,
so hard to speak, but yet so easy to lie.
i'm standing here with my heart in my hand,
hoping you will stay
but knowing that you will never understand.
i'm drowning in a sea of my own tears,
facing everything that i had always feared,
not knowing how scary it can be,
not believing that it's all happening to me,
standing here fighting for air,
wishing all of this could only be a nightmare.
i feel myself struggling to fight all the tears,
but time doesn't always last and now i'm here,
waiting for you to call out my name,
but knowing it will always end up being the same.

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