Hopeless Nights


You don't see it when I cry
Or when my heart breaks a little more
Or when I smile because you text back
You don't know how it feels when you text back
Or when you give me hope
Hope is a word that is fading around you
My hope gets real high, then I lose it
You have given it to me too many times
Then, ripped it out of my hands
You are the reason I cry myself to sleep
You are the reason my heart breaks a little more
You can text me and I light up
But then, I realize there is no point
All you do is give me false hope
Why can't you be there?
You were there to make me
Now I am almost eighteen
Trying to talk to you
All you do is reject me
What is the point, I ask myself
You don't care
Never have nor will you ever
You are just a sperm donor now
Just a sperm donor
You are not even worthy of the name Biological Father
I hope you know that

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This Poems Story

My biological father has never been in my life. Until, these last five years or at least I was trying to let him be a part of it. Everytime I tried he just failed me, so I wrote this poem because I was so angry with my biological father for just another failure he had shown me. He has hurt me repeatedly and I never know how to handle the pain, so I wrote what I was feeling about him the last time he hurt me. Now, maybe he will see my pain.