I Have a Secret

I have a secret.
A secret between me and my heart.
A secret that makes my insides hurt.
But a good kind of hurt.
A pain that makes me smile.
A discomfort that makes me want to dance.

I have a secret.
A secret that makes me stay awake at night.
Awake and sobbing.
Questions my loyalty, my worth.

I have a secret.
A secret that makes me furious.
Balling my fists, wanting to just hit
Over and over and over
Until I become awake and sobbing.
Questioning myself, am I worth it?

I have a secret.
A secret that I keep away from my heart.