I Know a Girl


I know a girl who was created from the very essence of bliss

Her gleaming smile was indefinite, her eyes contained the mere concept of hope, and her spirit operated on the simple thought of ingenuity. With stubbornness being the voice she could never silence, she’d win every battle against the belief that a thing could be nefarious. Her intellect was beyond compare, beginning at the age of eight, and her kindness reached that of the most delicate flower. The stars spoke to her in a language not forged of noise, but of a glimmering dance in which the stage was the sky and the spotlight was the moon. She fathomed those who were overlooked, and in a selfless act, pushed herself down so they could rise up. She was compassionate, inspiring, altruistic, and most of all pure.

I know a girl who hid a lot of secrets

The missing puzzle pieces that fabricated her existence were shrouded from her family, friends, enemies, and the strangers who trudged past her without taking a second glance. It’s astonishing how much a long – sleeved sweater and a forced smile can obscure from unenthused eyes. She couldn’t bear to remove the mass of burdens strangling her mind and give that suffering to another soul; she didn’t desire sympathy, her intention was to please all that she could, and so she would.

I know a girl who trekked down a road in which she could not return

Her mind was overflowing with intricately tangled thoughts of chaos and madness. She often embraced the demons that encompassed her because they were seemingly the only ones who understood the nightmare she was living. She drew with silver and it came out as a deep, crimson red, creating a tragically emotional masterpiece. Her whole physique was a canvas to a galaxy of bruises and a sea of gashes. She was tormented for the way she looked and as a result starved herself into becoming thin. Her motivation to simply breathe day after day ceased to exist. She was no longer living, but dying in the wake of those who were too narcissistic to even distinguish her crumbling will to survive. Her soul had become nothing more than a ghost with a beating heart.

I know a girl who tried to end her life

She became too frightened of the next appalling chapter of her life, and decided that her story was finished. She didn’t believe that there was a possibility things would improve and wanted to be free of the agony. Nobody would care, nobody would miss her. Her memory would be buried along with her corpse.

2:37 a.m., was the moment her heart stopped beating, her mind ceased to think, and her final breathe was complete; it was over.
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And then it wasn’t.

Her attempt at greeting death with a smile failed, and she was forced to live life with that sensation of being so close to freedom.. so close to getting away from the misery. Her yearning for demise never left her thoughts, and has forever since haunted her.

I know a girl who’s no longer a girl

She’s a storm with skin. A zombie walking amongst a world full of humans. The shattered glass in which nobody seeks to repair. A mistake that must be erased. An empty body that somehow still functions. A natural disaster that annihilates people’s lives.

She’s hollow, she’s exhausted, she’s uncontrollable, and she’ll forever be possessed by the demons within.

How is it I know?

Because that monstrosity is me.

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