Insidious Insanity

I sat in this same spot just last week
With a bottle of wine in hand
Screaming screw the world, hardly being meek
Screw god and his beautiful plan
Because this hand I was dealt
Well I hate it and I can't accept it
So I try to drink away my problems
And find some peace
But oblivion is no longer a sufficient release
And I blame myself for the issues that escape my mouth
When will I just say enough is enough
To the self punishment I endure
Call out my own bluff
I'm constantly deceiving myself
Of the truth of my reality
Faking and imitating a different personality
One that I think will be acceptable to you
Still most nights I pray for the end
To just be through
With all this recklessness I pursue
Because I can't seem to mend
All the damage I produce
So even further I induce
The sorrow and the pain
Then the bottle is back to seduce
And again I succumb
To the assiduous need to be numb

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