Just A Crush

These "feels" are just a product of my infantile infatuation, intoxicated with you in my imagination.
An artificial attack allowing the sole purpose of my soul's annihilation.
I probably pushed you away with my precious procrastination.
Every time I see you I get this electric experience of elation

I'm not sure if even I understand what I was trying to say.
What I'm attempting to convey is that if you never notice me that will be okay
If I ever get the courage to talk to you and you talk relentlessly about your "bae", that's okay
I'll be okay, okay?
You're okay, okay?
I've said okay so many times, it's getting annoying because the reality is that I'm not okay.
I care about you, and every time I try to communicate that, I fail while falling deeper into the rabbit hole.
And I wonder, does fortune truly favors the bold?
I smile whenever you look at me because I need to impress you, right, that's how it works these days, okay?
You're not just a crush... no way, I'm not being childish okay
I'll do whatever you say, You're not just a crush okay

As the feelings fade, I wonder what went wrong
It appears that for attraction to become love you have to build a foundation before the storm comes
We fear never finding love when we are young
We mature and we find what we thought was love is long gone
For infatuation is built on presenting the perfectly photoshopped performance of your life
While love is built on trust, letting the light pass through the darkest corners of your mind
As time passes it becomes painfully apparent
Infatuation is translucent while love is transparent

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