King of New York


Oh the glory of being a rat in New York City!
Underground my playground, aboveground my feeding ground.
I go where I wanna go, I do what I wanna do.
Surrounded by my strong army of family and friends, I am king.
My kingdom vast and wide.
I rule.
Those humans don't know.
They look at me with disgust, but sustain me with their waste.
Delectable tidbits cast aside, the fresh trash...a chef's spread.
I feast.
I mount whom I choose.
Rat chicks abound, tantalizing me with their sexy waddle.
They love me 'cause I'm a cool rat. A handsome rat. A virile rat.
I breed.
My coat is shiny and my rat tail long.
Thick at the base and tapered to a point, I slap aside young rats
daring to twiddle their whiskers on my tasty scavenged treats.
I dominate.
The two-legged uprights think they can fool me.
Try to poison, trap and kill me. But they underestimate me.
'Cause I'm a smart rat. A cunning rat. A strategic rat.
I plot.
One day, my rodent army and I will take over New York City.
We'll plot. We'll dominate. We'll breed. We'll feast. We'll rule!
In ruthless, unchecked abandon. Muah-haha-ha-ha-ha-haaa!

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