leaving is an illusion

Today I imagined I said goodbye to you and I know it doesn’t seem fair.
In my defense I’m sure if given the chance you’d give my heart more than just a little tear.
I can’t count the times I’d thought of what I’d say if I had the courage to just up and walk away.
Now I’ve left myself wondering would you really even care.
These thoughts plague my mind like a wounded fish fighting for air.
This struggle begins to crumble like the bread a beggar was trying to smuggle.
Ever drowning in thoughts I swore would be my last.
With a waking gasp I’m pulled from this mirage of despair.
Yet still the hardest part was waking and knowing you were never there.

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