Living With


Gray turns to white
And White to gray
to blue, black, brown, green, to another day
Blue turns to curtains
Black to a tv
Brown to my couch
And green to the trees
I am awake in a wave
Inside exhaustion's coursing stream
Blue and whites engulf me
And drag me back to sleep
Eyelids flicker open to the nothing that surrounds
I fall
Lungs fail to rise
Can't breath at all,
I drown
Why can't I move
Where am I now?
Fighting and screaming inside my mind
But not a drop of sweat on my brow
A nightmare only a memory
Reality back in sight
I start to think of the day again
But I know I will lose the fight
My therapist says these nightmares are always in the past
Whether they are real or not
thoughts determine how long they last

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