Having to live without your child is a devastating life.. No words can depict the horror and pain that rushes through ones veins. No parent should have to out live their child its simply cruel and unfair. Nothing remains the same forever a void that can never be filled their name forever imprinted in your soul  always day dreaming of how they would be today looking at their sweet face in that picture frame knowing that is all that remains.. I look at my daughter and i lose it often because im blessed to hold her and see her grow.. Shes so beautiful and smart and kind and losing my son has only made me hold on tighter and just stop and appreciate every second God gives us together. Its an emotional roller coaster i cant deny that.. I often get asked do you have children i say yes 2 because my son he lives in the chambers of my fragile heart he keeps me mended when life gets tough i dont only live for sidney but i live for him everyday im tortured by the thought of the reality of his absence but im reminded of the gift of my first born child so much love and happiness a gift indeed to be a mother nothing compares to that for me. I love my children even if he is up there in that sky he's loved and never frogotten 

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I lost my son in 2013 his memory forever lives imprinted in my heart