Love’s Suicidal Ideation

Years of memories, time will not fade.
Reality for you though, yes, shall jade.
So quickly it goes from you to who knows--
Happy and cheerful,
Conspiracy and distrustful.
I see you as before and now.
You see me, for what used to be.
I try to hold it together, worrying yet proud of thee.
Who should I tell, is not for me.
For the few of others who also know, it is up to them, again, not me.
I want to explain but also hurt am I.
Would make it worse, as I cry.
Wish though I could, trade place with ye.
Thought to end me ahead of you.
Would such sacrifice prevent the inevitable?
Or hurt those more less formidable.
I want to save you, said inevitable.
Save you from confusion and conspiracy.
Let you go on to read happily, merrily.
What I want cannot yet be,
Till maybe we are together, forever in eternity.

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