Malaise


I could drive off into outer space.
No one would ever really know. Maybe then I wouldn't feel so out of place.
It isn't easy for me to let you go.
People always leave. Seldom do they find their way back.
We're conditioned to be selfish and to deceive.
We throw away good things when they crack.
I've put on my best face.
On silent wings we fly.
There are no winners this time. Life's a bitch, then you die.
You were just a lowly drifter when I first ever crossed your path.
Little did I know, you were a hurricane.
I would soon endure your wrath.
In our own heads, we ride in this car full of infinite melancholy.
Broken, we head down this insolent highway. No smiles. Nothing jolly.
It goes on and on for what seems like years.
Everything is blurry.
I'll miss you when you're not here.
Tonight we sit divided just like the double yellow lines.
I always knew what I had when I had you.
I don't know how to say goodbye. Phantom after phantom we pass in the darkness.
I'm haunted by your glowing eyes.
My foot's pressing down on the accelerator.
Both of my hands are tightly gripping the wheel.
I want so bad to tell you how your departure makes me feel.
Which will be the first to break down?
Should I bet on the car or maybe myself?
Surely not you, nothing can make you melt.
Distance, there's always been a slight one between us.
But it's never been quite like this.
I wonder if I'll ever see you again.
Is there anything about me you'll miss?
In and out, just in and out of everything.
Time, cars, friends, clothes, houses, money, love, mattress springs.
All are temporary much like human beings.
I'll probably never get a second thought from you after tonight.
So while I have you here in the passenger seat, I'll revel in your presence, delight.
You and I are fragments from a more damaged class where there was very little refinement and an excess of crass.
Neither of us came from lovely gift-wrapped boxes.
We were shaken, tossed around, and dropped. We're paradoxes.
Bruised with imperfections and tiny little indentions.
We're the clearance racks in expensive stores.
Our hearts big, but so contentious.
No silver spoons have ever graced our lips.
No silver coated platters can be found in our midst.
We're not starving but we're far from spoon fed rich.
Just two unique gems that came from a roadside ditch.
To them, we were always "this" when really, we were more like "that."
Our childhood homes were broken. We're the shattered ones in both of our families. We're glass.
No one deserves saving from that cruel, unpleasant past.
The one common ground that you and I will always share,
are the homes we had as children. Ugliness and despair.
Incredulously, from the moment I first saw you, you painted light on my darkened soul.
Indelible little markings, with colors to fill in the gaps and holes.
Time passed and it passed. We happily danced along.
But one day the music stopped. We could no longer hear the songs.
By some invisible burglar our happiness had been copped.
The wheels that once spun uncontrollably had now came to a complete stop.
The lights in our vibrant color scheme went out.
Daily, my stomach turned.
My heart grew heavy as our skies began to cloud.
I knew our bridge had burned.
But the ending soon approaches now. Nothing stirs. The wind doesn't howl.
No sounds at all are even made.
If my eyes could, they would torch our parade.
So much about you that I don't want to forget.
Deep is the water in my pool of regret.
Full of sorrow. Full of shame.
If you drink gasoline you'll one day swallow flames.
Here it is, we've came to your stop. Nothing left to say.
Goodbye and good luck.
We're stalling now. Halted at this dark, dead end abode.
It ends the same either way. It doesn't matter the direction we go. Our hands swiftly waving like the billowing branches of trees.
We say our final goodbyes and I'm shaking at the knees.
This is the saddest part, it's the part where you must open the door and go.
Nothing lasts forever. Sadly, this much I do know.
But please, I beg you, please!
Just one more cigarette before you leave.
Tomorrow I'll wake up alone. When I open my eyes you'll be gone.
I know love is pain and pain is love but I once had no reservations. I always knew the day would come when you'd leave, but you exceeded my greatest expectations.
As quickly as you came, you had gone.
Uprooted, plucked like a lucky clover.
I don't know where to go from here.
It's hard to believe it's all over.

Poem Rating:
Click To Rate This Poem!

Continue Rating Poems


Share This Poem