My Next Trick

never connection
or running and hiding
so in every interaction
i speak less-than-full truths
it is never all me
is it ever all you?
a child looks to mother
digging for passion
not in her voice-
our first confusion
between orders and actions.
we try not to think
of life in this moment
always preparing
for someday
how can i trust
to love another
if i need to lie
to love myself?

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