My Ship

After a night of meaningless banter, opinions brandished like swords
I lay awake on the couch with only my heating pad to keep me warm
I am a shell of a woman
I am a powerless voice in my own world of chaos
I feel choked by the grip of my own emotionless self
This was not my vision this is not what I am worth
I am now a weak aluminum shell
I have lost my grip on those once graspable goals
I am now a beggar with my hands out hoping he will notice
take pity on the girl he once knew
but the man keeps passing my cup left empty
and each time I can feel his superiority
linger as only his shadow remains
I am left confused with my role in this world I am left alone
in the dark hoping the monster won't awake me from my dreams
I am hoping the tides will shift and the seas will calm
so I can finally sail but I am anchored
I am sinking, I am not the captain but the ship
the ship that has carried the burden of a thousand trips
that is taking on water that is rotting from within
I surely will sink, be the discarded debris at the ocean floor
I will be lost and buried
hopefully one day discovered and cherished
placed on shelf for all to admire and looked at
To be treated like the beautiful treasure I am

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