Needlepoint Lullaby

He sang sweet songs, sweet needlepoint lullabies

His eyes were crystalized, their awestruck blackness ate me whole

I stayed mesmerized by his carelessness and smooth complexion

He spit ease and promised comfort

He fed off the helpless story my eyes told

Like a rat chewing holes in already worn socks

Two more strangers brought together by a spoonful of pretty crystals,

Praying for something better

The dope trampled through our veins, fusing us together

I take the shot and let it break me to pieces

I become fragments, collaged together to make one needless disaster

I am legs, I am eyes, I am lips, I am warmth, I am sultry

I am delirium, I am carelessness, I am 37 flavors of wreckage

I am the thrust in his hips and the look in his eyes, I am property

I am just weight on the mattress

I am another girl on another motel bathroom floor

I stay paralyzed in this moment, in my fear of a better way

In this ecstasy, in my remembrance of all lost things

It wraps around me like lights on a Christmas tree

My bad decisions and remorse surround me

In a cheap motel room with broken windows and a broken TV

It breathes in my heartbreak and exhales my defeat

I am alone but my broken parts fit right in

The sticky windows separate us from daily life

We're just chasing after freedom in the wrong place,

Singing our needlepoint lullaby

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