Never Closure

These eyes of mine have seen too much, this fear of abandonment
with in the past in mind.
My family was functional and loving, only if i'd remember.
I was five, when my dad's death leaving this life behind.
My mother went crazy remarried a few months later, But with
that ring gave her freedom, to drink her pain away.
Consumption doesn't cure, branded my mind of how cold and
oblivious a person becomes, everyday...
I was all alone all the time, two sisters... But they wanted to
escape the hell that was home, they did.. not me.
Too young, still in elementary, the youngest, I cried soo much...
I was brushed off and pushed away, crying alone hystarically.
What was wrong with me, did I do something wrong?
Is it my fault you don't stay? Drinking till you lose your sight.
She shows herself to me, drunk as a skunk. Explaining to me
explicit swingers bars and couples, then out breaks a fight.
Many patched holes in several rooms of that house. Memories
of pain were not what should have filled that place.
Years have gone, the memories reinact with in my mind. I'm not a
drinker. I choose not, especially looking at my child's face.

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