Never his

I don't know what to do
I don't know what to say
I know I did wrong, but it doesn't feel that way
I buried it deep
Deep inside
Yet it still wont purge out of my mind
I try to lie
To make it perfectly alright

Even if it always makes me wanna cry

Cant avoid it
Still gonna try
Fuck her advice
She doesn't even follow mine

She says to talk it out
Throw away my pride
I tell her the same thing
She rolls her eyes

What can I tell him to make it alright
His dirty glass eyes sends shivers up my spine
Full of disgust
He wishes I would disappear
Or is that all in my mind?

I walk around with a smile
Force fed upon my face
With every second
Of every minute
Of every day

Its like I'm a pill popper
Slowing decaying away

I wish he could see
No matter how disgusting and vile it could be
Everything I think

Everything that is slowing breaking me
Turning my clattering bones to dust

I wish he could see
So I wouldn't have to speak

To let him know it was me
who ruined everything

[ its all lies, I want to think he never threw me aside]

He would never hurt me

[Yes he would]
[Yes he did]

It my fault, always mine.
Never his

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