New Me


Sometimes, when I'm alone, I can feel my heart crying. 
The words of a sad song about  broken hearts
And I weep with it.
The chill of a house that longs to be a home
The echoes from empty rooms calling out in vain longing for response
And I wait with them
I pass the time by lying to myself
I fake a happy smile and venture out
But I am hiding
Behind the mask,
 deep within my soul
I am dying
I took this road so long ago,
the lefthand turn that lead to the destruction of my faith,
the solitude of my soul and the emptiness of my spirit
I blamed others for my departure. I hated openly
I cursed my faith and handicapped my life.
I fought the truth,
welcomed the darkness and invited others to follow me
relished in the misery of my wake
How can I be welcomed home?
the prodigal son who so openly defied all?
I am afraid. 
 But as my tears freely flow as I scribe these words,
 I know now I am not alone.
I will stumble and I will fall,
but with you beside me I know I will not fail.

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