For so long, I've been afraid, of what I could not control.
Not afraid of death, but fear to never have lived.
Twenty years old, and I miss my youth, present as I could ever be.
I didn't have a perfect childhood, but at least nothing haunted me.
Now, the slightest swelling of my skin causes a deep fright,
occasional headaches make me wonder
if I'll wake after sleep that night.
Of not being worry free.
Of letting my thoughts control me.
Of letting negativity consume me.
I know that some day I'll find peace,
deep within my soul.
And some day,
I'll learn to love the things that are out of my control.
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