Not a Borealis

The lights you see up there are not where I got my name
Their beauty
Elegance and magic
I will never be the same

I've never seen them
These northern lights
Except in pictures
I look them up
Try to figure out where I came from

Elegance and magic don't describe me
At least not the part I see
I'm a clutz
I stumble
I fall
I screw up

I don't know why Aurora is what they call me
Even though its the name my parents gave me
Why do I share a name with something so beautiful and good
It ought not be me, but I know who it should

I am the essence of disorder
I am the precursor for chaos
I scramble for papers and never find them
I fumble for words and hardly grasp them

If anyone should be a borealis it isn't me
While an Aurora I may be
If I were to be a borealis I wouldn't be me
But Aurora I will always be

and awkward

and somewhat wayward

A little weird
Add a hint of dorky
Throw in some geek
And you've got me

I break things
And I shatter others
I am a tree falling in a storm
I am the furthest thing from the norm

If you want elegance and beauty
Try somewhere that isn't this
Cause if there's one thing I know
Its that I am not a borealis

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We all have a name that supposedly describes us. What do they really mean? Do our names make us? Or do we make our names?