On Drowning

Over my head and down my throat,
drowning am I in an ocean of my own creation.

The pounding of my heart, like war drums in my ears
Breaths greedily withheld refuse to be contained;
they release in floods of gleaming lights and shapes
that both captivate and blind me.
I stay here, suspended, mesmerized by my essence as it rises
above me.
Cold fingers reach out and
grope for the life being lost.

I feel so very lost at this moment.
My body sinks lower into darkness,
and the night entwines itself
around my ankles.
I still stare towards the glittering lights
I tried to hide away,
now so vulnerable and free.
So unobtainable.

How did I ever think I could keep them?

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