I am stuck,
like a puppet in a freak show,
the future is controlling me.
We are sailing in my tears,
nearly touching the anchored fears,
in the deep end,
where all my love has sank.
Go on, row the boat,
this feels too nice,
why is it so safe here?
But oh no,
it has been so long,
I forgot that I existed.
Only thing I know is negativity,
it feels weird to do things differently.
It is exhausting in here,
a weak brain can't take the pain from itself,
it hurts too much to take it from others.

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