I need someone to be there.
I need someone to have my back.
I have never realized just how alone I have been
in my life.

I have never taken the time to think about what
I wanted and what would make me happy.

Pretending became a way of life.
Adjusting became my action.
Watching is my pastime. Mom.

I did not make waves.
I did not say what I was feeling or even
admit to myself what I was feeling. Daughter.

It has been easier to think of others.
It has been easier to pretend I do not have needs.
It has been easier to let things be, even things that
hurt me and make my life more difficult. Rape victim.

I want the pain to stop and I want to be happy.
I am not sure how to do that.
That is not how I have lived my life. Woman.

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