Protecting Myself from Emotions

My love was not completely fulfilled.
My confidence is just a mask.
I try to speak; no words come out.
I deny emotions and the pain they bring.
I protect myself, no matter the cost.
I smile hoping that it will stop.
My Wonderland is inside my head
but, darling, this is not Wonderland,
and I am not Alice.
I'm a grenade. I will explode.
I long for the day to say:
"I too was once a tragedy."

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