Pursuit of Happiness

being with you was like being in a movie.
that's what my friends all said when i told them about you.
but how could they know, really?
how can anyone even imagine the way it felt--
the sparks shooting up my spine
as your calloused fingertips traced my ribcage,
your arms cradling my head as the galaxy exploded
in a supernova of you and me and sweat and music
i'm usually good with words.
i can usually write poetry
or prose about how this feels, but then again,
it's never felt like this. not ever.
your tongue and teeth and words--
god, you made love to me with your words.
what do i see in you? i see an angel with freckles.
i'm kind of afraid of you.
i'm scared of your beautiful hands,
and the way you make me feel.
i'm scared that you'll take away
the drug i found in your mouth.
i know what we had wasn't love.
i don't want it to be love. i'm sick of love.
what we had was more like magic.
i almost think it's good we couldn't keep it.
keeping you at arm's length
will keep me safe and whole.
in one year,
your lips will be my vacation.

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