questions about you
These are the inquiries that occupy my mind.
How? How is it that we conversed for no longer than 20 seconds
yet my head restlessly attempts to distract itself from frantic fictitious fantasies
from horsedrawn carriages, and “the most charming of marriages”?
How enchanting must you possibly be
to install this fraudulent infatuation upon me?
What? What caused this?
What stars were compelled to align before us
to further seal my predetermined fate?
What drew you into my imperfect world
and were you drawn to be my medicine or poison?
My salvation or destruction? My light, or my darkness?
What are you?
Why? Why am I drawn to you?
Is it because of the time of day that you “bestowed on me so gracefully”?
The fact that you acknowledged my hard work?
Or is it because there’s something there?
That there, in fact, was a spark
and the roaring fire isn’t just a fabricated fairytale in my head?
I may never know due to my failure to transform the illustrations in my mind into words you could understand as they fall off my tongue. Why didn’t I try?
When? When will be the next time I see you? The next time I gaze from afar or catch a glance over my shoulder? Or was that it? Did I underestimate the value of that single meaningful compliment you handed to me? The seconds I could have transformed into minutes? Now I sit here, dreaming of what could have been, longing for us to cross paths for a fraction of the time we had because now, now I have come to appreciate it. Now I feel man’s truest regret, in its bitterest form. My heart yearns for that moment. Our encounter was 600-carat diamond dressed as a simple, meaningless, rock.