To all those who say I am unforthcoming and guarded,
It’s because you have shown me how my secrets are safe only when not shared or else they are disregarded.
To all those who say I am too rowdy,
It’s cause for too long I have been reticent about my feelings.
To those who feel i don’t believe in what you say,
It’s because I have seen how wrong you have been every time you have claimed to be right.
To all those who think I was a mistake,
Welcome to the hell I live through every single day.
To everyone out there,
I am not perfect,
not that you would care,
but i’m not here to connect.
Lately I’ve been trying to recollect
Every fault specked.
Was it being the fit sperm?
Or was it trying to be the best one?
Was it being a good confidant?
Or was it trying to find one?
Was it trying to run away?
Or was it wanting to stay?
Was it the way I procrastinate?
Or was it the way I’d create?
Was it the way i’d seek?
Or was it the way i’d pull away?
Only fault to be found is my catastrophic existence
Which now has lost it’s significance.
The only thing between life and me is resistance.