Rock, Paper, Scissors Says Sh!t


Lying in his bed
I look at the ceiling
And stare at the crack above me
Ready to play rock, paper, scissors
He draws the scissors
And I the paper
I’ve known how this ends
Since I was a little girl

Lying in his bed
I look at the ceiling
And stare at the crack above me
To avoid looking into
The eyes on top of me
So they won’t see
All that I’m striving to conceal
The unmistakable truth
The words that won’t vacate my mouth
Written so loudly on my face

Lying in his bed
I look at the ceiling
And stare at the crack above me
As he goes deeper and deeper
Faster and faster
He rips his way through me

Lying in his bed
I look at the ceiling
And stare at the crack above me
As I feel him inside me
I wonder if he can feel my pain
If he were to kiss me
Would he taste the screams I swallow

Lying in his bed
I look at the ceiling
And stare at the crack above me
I call for the rock
But the rock doesn’t hear
The scissors tearing me apart
So I lie there as unarmed paper
Vulnerable to the scissors
That thoughtlessly cut through me

Lying in his bed
I look at the ceiling
And stare at the crack above me
As I realize that I disarmed myself
By lying there as paper
I cover the rock
And silence the power
To crush the scissors
That rupture me

Lying in his bed
I look at the ceiling
And stare at the crack above me
I tell him that as he goes
Deeper and deeper
Faster and faster
He rips through me

Nothing came out of my mouth
But we both heard me

Lying in his bed
I look at the ceiling
And stare at the crack above me
He sees me look at nothing
But I know he saw everything

Lying in his bed
I look at the ceiling
And stare at the crack above me
To avoid looking into
The eyes that saw
All that I never could conceal
The unmistakable truth
The words that never needed to vacate my mouth
Since they were
Written so loudly on my face
The agony his scissors caused
As they ripped me to shreds
And left my scattered pieces on his bed

Lying in his bed
Smothered in blankets
Of politeness
I asphyxiate on my own silence
I look at the ceiling
And stare at the crack within me
I’ve known this ending
Since I was a little girl

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